Changes

“One of the great dogmas of biology is that gender is fixed from birth, determined by the inheritance of certain genes on the X and Y sex chromosomes.”

The Independent

Impermanence is a basic principal of Buddhism and for good reason. We talk about death and taxes but the one true constant in life and indeed the universe, is change.

From stars to dust everything changes. Over time, we change as individuals, our relationships change, as do nations, as do cultures and of course, as a species. And yet accepting and managing change is one of the most difficult things we can face, especially changes in gender and how others relate to you.

Our society has changed over the past few decades. When I was young any male who displayed and feminine traits or heaven forbid wore a dress for example would be lucky to get down a street without abuse, psycological or physically. Nowadays things may not be radically different ‘on the street’ but they are so much better, in city centres certainly. This has been driven I believe by the interconnectedness provided by the web and some research which has permitted the media to feedback into peoples understanding in society, our politics and laws.

“I’m just trying to break down these gender stereotypes.”

Barack Obama

So I know I’m largely preaching to the converted here but I’m pretty sure there are many more younger people accepting of their transition even accounting for the increase in population now compared to say 40 years ago.

Because gender roles in general are becoming increasingly fluid, it’s possible that some younger people didn’t feel so confined by expectations, so they don’t feel as strong a need to experience adolescence in their correct gender. Also, maybe they remember their first adolescence better, since they have just recently lived it, and they don’t really want to go through another one so soon.

Tranifesto

Still in 2015 for a young person there are many challenges to coming out and being accepted as not part of a binary gender position, which may in society still cling too. For younger people just growing up through adolescence is difficult enough without even adding in gender confusion about how they may feel compared to what they are told. 

Also there currently seems to be a bracket of T-girls who are approaching or passing 50 years old. It is logical to give the reason to this change as a mid-life crisis. Now I’m sure relative age and timing have a lot to do with it but maybe it is all part of the same change in society and could more be termed a second adolescence. A process that affects all genders and all people to some degree in different ways - not just M2F or Trans' individuals. I know that is certainly how I feel about it.

For more mature persons (yes moi) we have the benefit of being more sure of the world and our abilities. However the challenges are big simply because our personal history and commitments are stronger and appear clearer. Work and income could be lost. If you have a family, as most do, this could then all disappear, effectively destroying everything you may have spent your life working for. And yet like fine rain over time, the feeling of what you are supposed to be, the character your programmed past as written in the minds of others is inevitably soaked completely in the realisation of who you are inside.

But these were the things that we were supposed to say and do, and the clothing and hairstyles that we were supposed to wear, and the attitudes and behaviours that we were supposed to have when we were going through our first adolescence. It’s just that we never got a chance, because it was the wrong adolescence. When we finally have a shot at the right one, I say we should go for it. It passes soon enough.

Tranifesto

For young and not so young, any friends you have will stay friends, if they really are friends; even if the friendship changes, but you should expect the relationship to change if you do.

As for a reason as to why we do this I can’t give a single answer as I’m sure there are several factors. But click here or on the Independent logo below for an interesting article on gender and change at a cellular level which may be a part of it. The following three quotes are from that article.

“…findings suggest that being male or female is not a permanently fixed state but something that has to be continually maintained in the adult body by the constant interaction of genes to keep the status quo – and the gender war – from slipping in favour of the opposite sex.”

“The results could explain some of the great mysteries of human gender, for instance why some women after the menopause develop male characteristics, such as facial hair and deeper voices, or why other people are so unhappy with the gender they were born with that they seek hormone therapy and radical sex-change operations.”

“…If it is possible to make these changes in adult humans, it may eventually remove the need for surgery in gender-reassignment treatment…”

A more technical link regarding the story can be found here:

From a species over time down to our individual cells on a daily basis, our gender and understanding of it changes constantly.

So why do so many seem so surprised by this?

My point on change in general and specifically gender?

Flexibility (change) is a strength not a weakness.

Diversity (because of changes) is a strength.

So try not to overly judge,

where it is so obviously unnecessary.

Good to talk

Just a short post and highlight some of the local group gatherings organised in the UK for Transitioning people not just M2F. I’ve mentioned them before in an earlier post but in all the digital transgender talk on the internet you might easily miss the Beaumont Society. They’ve been going since 1966 working transgender community so have some experience on the matter.

They have regional organisers to contact about these local gatherings so if you feel like you need advice or support in how you feel or even with thoughts on coming out or your family etc please follow the link here or the pin in the map below and ask for a little help and advice. It’s why they are there and why they were established.

This post was prompted by a discussion this weekend with someone to whom I totally forgot to mention the above. So hope its of some help.

Hate & Fear

Citizens Advice define a hate crime as an act of "violence or hostility directed at people because of who they are or who someone thinks they are."

You know, every time I think of my blog I think I’ll do something about fashion or make-up and then something barges in from the side. It’s really an issue of priority and this is something I really didn’t want to do a blog about but, well… it’s a truth. I noticed a level of this personally when replying to a You Tube post on Caitlyn Jenna recently.

Whilst not all negative there was a contingent of comments which seemed irrational and based in dogma rather than thought.

So this was sitting in my mind when I was listening to Cami's Crossdressing Canopy Podcast and she mentioned how someone shouted swearing at her in public but not because she was dressed or presenting fem’ but simply because she was in an Asian country and she was western? Bigoted hate actions are not just aimed at Trans’ people obviously. Cami’s take on this is you will always find people who disagree or hate you but this shouldn’t taint your self belief.

This is mirrored in the main point of this article which is a BBC news report on how LGBT people experience hate crime 'too often’.

The article refers to Talulah Eve Brown who appears to be a really savvy and lovely individual who can rise above the hate she receives.

My point of view is fairly simple on all this. Blanket statement I know! Usually people who appear to hate irrationally are actually frightened. People can be hated because of their colour, gender, age, or many other reasons other than something they have actually done. Or like Cami, simply being from another place.

Most bias racism or any ‘ism’ can be described the same. Maybe it’s easier to react rather than think and deal with people as individuals? This is not an excuse and I have no sagely advice on how to handle it other than I believe how you face the world determines to some degree how the world reflects back upon yourself. Try not to react against their reaction and like Talulah hold to your belief and course. I admit I’m not always the best at taking my own advice.

Have belief in you. Treat others with politeness and compassion. And if you are a victim of abuse think: why are these people like this? Maybe their world is not so wonderfully coloured as yours? Maybe you should feel sorry for them…

This will not stop some of the more violent acts and it's very much easier said than done, but worth some thought.

Call Me Caitlyn

Caitlyn Jenner, formerly Bruce Jenner on Vanity Fair Cover. Another positive cover story...

News links:
Yahoo
BBC Newsbeat
YouTUBE

Drawn to Dresses

"Over the past six years there's been a four-fold increase in children aged 10 or under being referred to the unit in 2014-15, compared with 2009-10. Of those children, 47 were aged five or younger and two of the children were three years old."

BBC news article about two young Transgender girls and their change and schooling. It can be especially difficult for parents who, of all people, are more prone to mapping their expectations on their children. As usual with the BBC a sober account but a sign of the times non the less.

Link - The story of two transgender children

On the shores of an evolutionary ocean

(There are quite a few TED talk links in this post)

So I confess this blog goes somewhat beyond gender issues per se, but hey if your gonna dream, dream of dragons! As an inspirational start point I offer this short clip of Peter Weyland's 2023 TED Talk, essentially a viral for Prometheus the Movie.

The focus of this post is pretty simple. What does it mean to be trans in the much, much, broader sense? The short answer is almost every human is Trans - they just don’t know it. In the same way as we don’t appreciate that we travel through the universe at 390 kilometers per second - most just don’t see the changes so they don't know or want to believe.

Not one of us can really see the future. Saying this or that will happen in ten or fifteen years is not the point. The point is our journey and our attitude whilst moving along it. It is often mentioned that we predict landscape of the future from the perspective of the landscape the past, which may be true. But that shouldn’t mean we should be limited in our potential view of the future. Or put anther way, why accept yesterdays limitations today - or tomorrow.

As an example this article describes a woman of over 100 years old who despite only living 400 miles from the ocean had never seen it before. I use it as a metaphor to show how the future can be more...

And so on to today and tomorrow. Some time ago I watched this TED talk on the next stage of human evolution, “Homo-evolutus”. Or read the perhaps easier to digest blog - HighExistance.

It describes how humans will soon be in a position to determine their physical and possibly mental evolution on a needs or want’s basis to a point where defining exactly what a human is, may be difficult. In many ways I’d argue that M2F and F2M Trans people have been initiating this process for decades. Leading the way as it were emotionally if not technologically. But the real point on this talk (to me and this post) really implies that if we think changing your gender is radical, in the future people will wonder why we were concerned about such relatively minor change?

Looking further ahead, and nothing directly to do with Trans issues, other than the acceptance that we can and should have the right to be able to be what we want to be - is what comes after Homo-evolutus or what next?

I would argue Homo-evolutus may become or may better be called Homo-potentialus?

So, we are on the verge of the intelligence revolution which will change our society in far greater ways than the industrial revolution ever did. See this TED talk for reference. If you want to skip the first 7 mins that’s when the stats come in ;)

The outcome of this can only be what I’d term Homo-potentialus, meaning worrying about a fixed gender (a fixed anything) is like a caveman arguing with an astronaut, about how far they can throw a rock.

Like many stories or posts on this subject most of us in our daily lives don't have any direct control over the issues mentioned. However, like a passenger in an increasingly speeding car, we can learn how to lean into the corners and be empathetic to the changes.

So it is about attitude and how we use our minds. As humans we now rarely fight for patches of earth or the carcass, at least as individuals. Yet the old attitudes persist with some. Let us evolve. Let us be more. Let us be more than we were told we should be, could be. For you will always be you. Now isn't that trans' at heart?

As a sign off I quote Rocket Racoon from Guardians of the Galaxy...

“Ain't no thing like me 'cept me.”

I couldn't find the right clip on You Tube so if you want to see the actual quote , you'll need to watch the movie :)